Rules to Live By

Here are my rules for life. They are in no particular order, as I believe that they are equally important. I do my best to live by these every day, and since I have started to do that, my life has improved greatly. Yes, I backslide, but I try to get right back into “living by the rules” when I do.

1. Live now. Don’t put it off. I am not guaranteed a certain amount of time on this earth, so I must live life to the fullest every day. Within reason, I have to do the things I want to do now, not wait, for instance, until the kids are grown, or the house is paid off, or the price of gas goes down (yea, that’s going to happen). I’ve known too many people whose time ran out when they were relatively young and they regretted the things that they had never gotten around to doing.

2. Be yourself. It takes too much energy to try to be something I’m not, and I have better things to do. Additionally, other people know when I’m not being real, therefore, there is no point in trying to impress anyone or put on airs. It’s best just to accept and be happy with who and what I am.

3. Never forget that what goes around comes around. This simply means that I must treat people the way that I would like to be treated. If I treat someone badly, at some point, it will come back to me. It’s much nicer when the good that I do comes back.

4. Forgive yourself and others. Everyone has done things that they regret, some major offenses and some small ones. It does no good to dwell on them. If you are truly sorry for those things, and if you have asked for the forgiveness of God and the person you harmed, let go of them. Certainly if there is something more that can be done to make up for the offense, by all means, do it immediately. But sometimes, the best way that you can make up for it is not to do it again.

5. Listen to others. There is an art to listening, and many who think they listen actually do not. Listening means more than merely looking at the person who is speaking, it means giving them my full attention and often reading between the lines. Watch them, their gestures, their facial expressions, and their eyes. I can “hear” a lot this way. Listening to others makes them feel that they are special and important, that I really care what they have to say. Another important reason to listen is that if I’m not listening, I’m not learning. If I am not learning, I am stagnating. To learn, I have to listen.

6. Mind your own business. It is so much easier to worry only about my own affairs. Besides the fact that other people do not need me to take care of them, make their decisions, and generally try to live their lives for them, if I am taking care of my own responsibilities, I don’t have time to worry about everyone else and what they are doing and saying. I don’t always even know what’s best for me – how could I possibly presume to know what is best for anyone else? It’s just much easier when my own life is the only one that I’m trying to run.

7. Don’t hold on to anger and resentment. They can destroy my inner peace faster than anything else, and they have to be dealt with on an as needed basis, not be allowed to grow to unmanageable levels. High levels of these negative emotions can cause depression and anxiety as well as physical illnesses. I must deal with them as they come up, and then let them go.

8. Savor the little things. I get as much enjoyment out of many of the small pleasures in life as I do from the major ones. There is so much beauty to enjoy in the world, watching your kids play, listening to them laugh, admiring a sunset, taking a walk, reading a good book, taking a bubble bath, or any number of simple things that bring contentment. I must be sure that I take time to enjoy these simple things every day.

9. Love. There is no life without love, no reason for life without love. If I love unconditionally and stay in close touch with my loved ones, I am never alone. I am nurtured, and in turn, can nurture them.

10. Pray. I would lose my way and my will to enjoy life if I lost my connection with God. The only way I can stay connected is through prayer and meditation.