Learning To Say NO

It sounds so simple, just two letters, one tiny syllable, but it is one of the hardest words to say. Think about how many times you have wanted to say it but didn’t. Your head said NO, but your mouth said yes.

There are many reasons why we don’t say the word NO when we want to. We might be afraid that we will hurt someone’s feelings, so we sacrifice our own. Maybe we fear making someone angry, so we say yes and add more resentment to our already heavy baggage. Sometimes, we say yes out of habit. Many times, we say it because we feel bullied or pressured. Other times, we say it to avoid confrontation.

There are countless reasons why we agree to things that we don’t really want to do. But more important than figuring out why we do it is figuring out how to stop.

The following are simple, yet important things that we must learn so that we will be able to say NO when we want to:

Our time is just as important as everyone else’s.

We don’t have any more time than anyone else. Everyone has 24 hours/day, 7 days/week.

Other people’s responsibilities are not ours to take care of.

If someone gets angry because we say NO, that is not our problem.

Saying NO is healthier than piling up resentment.

If someone wants to challenge our right to say NO, we are free to walk away or stay and try to explain, whichever we choose.

Just because we had time to do someone a favor last week or last month doesn’t mean that we have the time, or the desire, to do it this time.

We must respect ourselves enough to do what feels right for us.

There is a difference in doing a favor for someone and letting someone take advantage of us.
The choice to say NO is ours. If we say yes when we really want to say NO, it’s our own fault.